The Laws of work: What your boss never told you!

It occurred to me the other day when the computer was down, the phone was ringing off the hook, and the deadlines were whooshing past me that there must be unseen forces governing offices and creating laws of probability to make us crazy!  Won't it be a easier if we just knew what these laws were? My experience over the years has taught me that the following rules apply to all kinds of work and to just about everyone who wants to succeed at work:

1.If your day is going well, don’t check your email: It's true

2.The better you do your work, the more work you will be given to do: It's true

3.Nothing can ever be done in the amount of time allotted to do it. It's true

4.Time management is another of the tasks that you don’t have time to complete.It's true

5.The closer the deadline gets, the more complicated the project becomes.It's true

6.If you suggest a good idea, you will be put in charge of implementing it.It's true

7.Your report is never so good that it can’t be improved, or so long that it can’t be longer.It's true

8.Computers will only calculate the information you give them.It's true

9.A four-day week with a holiday is longer than a five-day week. It's true

10.If you take a day off,  work will multiply until you get back.It's true

11.The right decision and the wrong decision are both better than indecision.It's true

12.There is nothing more satisfying than a job well done; except one assigned to someone else.It's true

13.Meetings are a waste of time - but an approved and essential waste of time.It's true

14.When everyone understands a policy, it’s time to change it.It's true

15.The more details in directions, the greater the likelihood they will not be understood.It's true

16.If someone sends email to keep from calling, they will call to see if the email was received.It's true

17.An error is never noticed until after the email is sent.It's true

18.Technology will always create as many problems as it solves.It's true

19.A stapler always jams and runs out of staples at the same time.It's true

20.When everyone understand the new computer software, it will be upgraded.It's true

21.Nothing gets done as fast as it does on the day before going on vacation.It's true

22.The telephone will always ring when you are totally absorbed with something else.It's true

23.The primary function of office workers is to ensure that paperwork is never completed.It's true

24.The easy jobs always end up taking more time than the difficult ones.It's true

25.After everything is done, we will still worry about whether we’ve done everything.It's true

26.The computers worked better before they were upgraded.It's true

27.Never say anything in an email that you do not want forwarded all over the office.It's true

28.The more important an email, the greater the probability that it will not go through.It's true

29.No matter how busy someone is, they always take time for lunch and smoke breaks.It's true

30.Problems always develop at the end of the day, never at the beginning.It's true

31.The day you have evening appointments will always be the day you can’t get out of work on time.It's true

32.Projects are never cancelled until they are nearly completed.It's true

33.If you misplace it, you will need it; if you find it, you will forget what you needed it for.It's true

34.If it’s been a great week, something important didn’t get done.It's true

35.When all else fails, remember you can fix any machine by turning it off.It's true

36.If you wait until the last minute to print, the printer will always jam or run out of paper.It's true

37.Documents always make more sense before being revised than afterwards.It's true